A Little About Women (Meal Time!)

I’m not against women having equality with men. Women should get the same pay in the workplace. Women shouldn’t be viewed as objects by the media and the world. Etc.

But honestly, I don’t think that women and men always have the same roles. The time has come to let people know where I stand about women wanting to receive the priesthood right now, when at this time it is not God’s will. (And perhaps might not ever be.)

My husband and I often share chores in the house. When he comes home from work and school, he changes the baby’s diaper and sometimes will help me clean the house. When he is at work, you might find me balancing our budget, mowing the lawn, or even using the electric drill. We have found that it is important to communicate with each other about what responsibilities and expectations we have in the roles we play. I don't think I'm entitled to having the priesthood. If at some later date, the prophet says that women can receive the priesthood, I will believe him. Until that time (if it ever even happens), I keep this list in my head:

Husband/Father’s Main Roles: 

• Protect
• Preside
• Provide
• Partner with wife in nurturing

Wife/Mother’s Main Roles:  

• Nurture
• Partner with husband in protecting
• Partner with husband in presiding
• Partner with husband in providing

About a week ago, I was reading in 2 Nephi 13, which is pretty much the same as Isaiah 3. While talking about the latter days and daughters of Zion, Isaiah says in verse 12:

“And my people, children are their oppressors, and women rule over them.”

Now, who do you think has the most influence on children more than any thing or person? Their mother. (Think back to the sons of the Ante-Nephi-Lehites and research scientific articles. They usually point back to the mother and/or parent unit.

Now, if the mother is seeking power, to “rule over them,” then is she fulfilling her role as nurturer? I guess the honest answer is probably not. If that is the mother’s greatest desire is to be a leader, then her greatest desire is not to be a nurturer. When she decides that nurturing goes on the back burner, then it seems obvious that “children [would be] their oppressors.”

I’m not going to go too deep into this. It can get nitty-gritty, but just let that sink in a bit.

Now, let’s talk about a wife’s role as a partner.

Partner in protecting: It is important for the mother to protect her children physically. Already I have rescued Squirmy from a bunch of mishaps through my physical protection for her. However, it is also important for parents to protect their children spiritually. I find that often it is my responsibility to set the spiritual tone within the home.

Here are some ways we can do that:

• Truly be there mentally for our children and husband. Try to understand them and listen.

• Play uplifting music and conference talks. Let only good media be in the home.

• Encourage individual scripture study and prayer, while also helping gather the family in for Family Home Evening and daily group scripture study and prayer.

• Attend the temple and show our children that we truly love it and try to keep the covenants we make at baptism and in the temple.

Partner in presiding: I don’t have much for this, so I would love to see your comments about it below.

What I do know is that a single mother, or a mother whose husband isn’t home, can have the power to preside over her family in righteousness. She may call on children to say prayers and hold interviews with her children. (Correct me if I'm wrong!)

Partner in providing: I truly believe that there are no roles more important than me being a good wife and mother. For some, being a good wife and mother could include working and for others, it does not.

Mister and I decided that as soon as I had Squirmy, I would stop being the breadwinner in the family. We would move forward the best we could with saved funds and Mister’s part-time job. We have been blessed immensely by this change, but I can say that there have been financial struggles. Yet, we remain out of debt and we are able to provide the basic necessities for ourselves.

 

However, partnering in providing doesn’t always mean bringing in an extra income. It could be about doing all you can to support your husband going to work or school. This could mean being an emotional support when he is feeling stressed. It could also mean packing the best lunches for him ever and having a nice dinner planned for approximately the time he gets home.

What are some of your ideas in to partner with your husband in providing?

Anyway, I want to hear your thoughts and ideas. Please don’t write any comments that are just plain mean. I don’t mind ones that don’t agree with my points of view, just as long as they are courteous.

Love,

Mrs. Unbe